Handle Painful Conversations Like A Boss - With Simple Positive Statements

No matter how much we may try, there is just no way to escape some difficult conversations. However, there are positive things we can say and do to help us better handle them.

The first response may be to change the subject when faced with a complex conversation. This will not solve the problem or heal the hurt that caused the situation in the first place. It is healthier to take in a deep breath, gather your thoughts, and face the difficulty now rather than later.

Keep in mind that it is not your responsibility to fix the situation unless you were directly involved. People sometimes need a friend to listen to when they are going through challenging circumstances. They do not want you to fix issues for them.

Being accessible to listen is sometimes the most excellent way to show your friend that you care.

If the situation obliges you to talk with a person going through struggles, try to put yourself in their shoes. What might you wish for a friend to tell you if you were in the same position? In all likelihood, they would love to hear that same thing.

Here are nine positive ways to handle difficult conversations:

1. Try to help them pinpoint the problem they are facing. Maybe they are upset over something that is not related to the apparent problem. Please take note of your friend as they talk, trying to ask questions to help them determine the real problem.

2. Avoid behaving like you know what will happen next. If your friend is going through a difficult time in a relationship, do not tell them the whole thing will work out. Instead, tell them, “I’m available to you at whatever time you want to talk.”

3. Ask broad questions rather than hope to reply to questions they may not be inclined to answer. “How is it going?” is a better question than asking them if they have walked out of their home after splitting up.

• Let them bring up other topics when they feel secure doing so.

4. Hold back from judging others. Instead of saying you have not ever trusted a particular business if your friend has just lost a sizable sum of money, you might want to ask, “Is there anything I can do to help?” Most likely, they will tell you no but will appreciate your asking.

5. Your similar situation is not the same as theirs. While it may be true that you have lost a job or a pet, it is not equivalent to losing a loved one.

• Aim to persuade your friend to think about the good times rather than their loss.

6. Recognize your friend’s feelings. “I understand that you are hurt by what they said. It would hurt me, too” This is better than saying to your friend, “There’s no reason to be upset about that.” Acknowledge and support their feelings, and they will feel better.

7. Think about what your friend needs most. It may be to have someone say, “I love you, or I care about you.” Strive to be attentive to your friend’s silent needs. Be encouraging when possible regardless if your friend has spoken a requirement or not.

8. Let others know you know their point of view. Telling someone, “This sounds important to you,” does not mean you will go along with whatever they like, but at least you acknowledge what they consider to be the best solution.

9. Stay focused on the problem, and do not get dragged into a fight. If they verbally attack, do not take the bait. Say something like, “I see you are upset, and I am sorry. Perhaps we ought to take a few minutes for each of us to calm down.”

It is important to remember that It is better to listen more than talk, no matter the problematic situation. When you speak, use the positive statements you find here to help you handle the conversation in a supportive and caring way.